bluets before bluets was bluets. so good. i wish i read this when i was in the thick of it.  

"for the first time, i could clearly perceive the material nature of feelings and emotions-i physically felt their consistency, their form but also their independence, their perfect freedom with respect to my consciousness. these interior states had their equivalent in nature: the surge of a wave, the crumbling of a cliff, sinkholes, algae blooms. i understood the necessity of comparisons and metaphors using water and fire."

"at times i thought i would go crazy from the pain. but the pain was actually a sign that i was not crazy".

"lying on my stomach, i began to imagine words beneath me that had the consistency of stones, tablets of the law. but the letters were dancing and coming together, then breaking apart, like those that float in alphabet soup. i absolutely had to capture these words, they were the ones i needed to set myself free, there were no others".