sol_journal's reviews
80 reviews

The Girl With No Reflection by Keshe Chow

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medium-paced

3.0

**Thank you so much Random House Children’s/RHCBEducators for the earc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 15 June 2024

3 out of 5 stars.

I feel a little betrayed by how people talk about this book compared to what’s actually in it. I’m skipping my usual rambles here and digging straight into the core of my thoughts, let’s go:

First off, I see it often described as ‘horror’ or ‘chilling’- it’s not. I was disappointed in this fact because I set it aside to read during my celebration of ‘Summerween’ where I just read spooky books throughout the summer since I usually can’t fill my fix during October. I want to say that I didn’t find it scary because it’s YA horror and I’m starting to get into more adult horror, but I find Kylie Lee Baker and Erin A Craig’s books a lot creepier and eerier than this- and both authors’ books are YA! This is a thriller at most, but that’s still pushing it. It’s a high fantasy YA novel with minimal eeriness in the beginning that doesn’t really carry through to the end.

Secondly, I had a love-hate throughout it. I feel like the plot and the characters were there, but they were *lacking*. Let me split this into a two parter, it’ll be short and connect in the end I promise. Characters first-
The characters were very trope-y. They did honestly feel like people plucked straight from C-Dramas which isn’t a bad thing! I just think they were just too heavily reliant on these tropes to move their growth along. The way the writing was also lent no hand in rounding them out. It was very Tell Not Show in a lot of places and it just made it hard to feel and connect with these characters.
The plot was very similar. It felt like a drama in that there were a lot of moving pieces, but I think that the length of the novel just didn’t allow it to reach its potential. Some bits felt rushed, others felt like they were thrown in for the sake of filling in a gap left open by another plot point. If the book were a little longer, I really do think it could’ve felt less… choppy and stitched together. I think there was just too many things trying to pull the story along that the ends got frayed along the way. And again, there were a lot of drama tropes tossed in that just didn’t really help to flesh out the actual book and it really just left me wanting something more or better from it.

I don’t have too much else on my reader notes about this- nothing that hasn’t been repeated above like five times a paragraph. I just wish I would’ve enjoyed it more! The premise was interesting. I read the summary and was *instantly* hooked, but I just don’t think the summary gave the story the right push-off it needed. It felt a little misleading, especially with so many people calling it horror when it’s not even terribly creepy (I guess the idea of this mirror world is creepy? But the execution lightened the blow that it could’ve had). I can definitely see how people can enjoy this though and I hope more people will!! For a debut book, it’s pretty nice especially for drama lovers. I just couldn’t get into it and never quite found my footing enough to enjoy it. As Keshe Chow grows more as an author, I’d love to see what else she comes up with! Because again, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, the story and the characters could’ve been so much better than they were if more time was given to them and if it was polished a little better.

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Ladykiller by Katherine Wood

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slow-paced

3.0

**Thank you so much Random House Publishing and Kathleen Quinlan for reaching out with an earc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 8 June 2024

3 out of 5 stars.

I tried to like this. I really did. I got to 20% then 25%, then told myself I’ll go to 35% to see how it’ll go and I still just had that love-hate relationship. When I start to feel this way with books, I’m wary to keep continuing because I start to get too critical over the smallest things and it further ruins the read.
So ultimately, I did decide to just DNF. I just don’t think this book is for me. It’s slightly out my range from the usual genres I pick. It’s also just a little slow and the characters a tad unlikeable in a bad way (because I love me a good unlikable or unreliable mc, don’t get me wrong)

I had this issue that a few others had in feeling that Gia’s manuscript POV was just… long. And it took too long to get to the point. I get that we’re peering into the buildup of what happened, but I don’t know… it just didn’t interest me yet there are a *lot* of chapters featuring Gia’s POV compared to Abby’s and that’s considering the fact that I didn’t even finish the book. I feel like I just wanted to see more of Abby, or more movement *anywhere*.

The premise was interesting, the whole idea, the cover, and the title- it was *interesting*, but the actual inside of the book just left me wanting. Maybe I’ll try again to finish this, but genuinely I don’t think it lined up with what I was expecting based off the summary and the cover? I think others will definitely enjoy this more than I have, but just for me personally, it really didn’t strike the right cord from the get-go.
Kill Her Twice by Stacey Lee

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adventurous hopeful inspiring mysterious tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes

3.0

**Thank you so much Penguin Group/Penguin Young Readers Group and Stacey Lee for the arc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 11 May 2024

3.4 (rounded down to 3) out of 5 stars.

Kind of struggling to write this review because I’m still on the fence of how I feel about this. I loved the theme, the plot, and the setting so so so much. The writing was a little lacking in some areas for me though. I didn’t feel as drawn towards the characters throughout the whole time I read, just during some scenes/parts. I think that if there was a little more depth to them, I’d have found ways to love them each a little more? They were just.. flat, with very redeeming qualities! Each of them, especially how May has her bits of growth or Gemma too! I also feel like Peony was kind of cast out too much? There was a bit of a struggle, it seemed, in deciding how important the little sister’s role would be in this too- or that’s what I felt anyways as I read.
What I liked was their cunning though. The sisters are given chances to grow, to see how they sway with the way the world is changing around them. There’s a certain kind of heart to be found in reading along, waiting to see how the mystery unfolds and just what might happen to our protagonists. I feel like that was the redeeming factor for me? Just the desire to see how the Chow Sisters will move next, how they’ll decide what’s best to do when it feels like things are wholly against them.

All of this back and forth to say that it was still an enjoyable read! I absolutely loved the era we are thrown in to, the challenges that the characters are battling, and the things they do for justice. In the heart of it all, it’s about friendship, it’s about family, and it’s about three sister clouds fighting against the perils thrown their way so they can stay together.

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Your Blood, My Bones by Kelly Andrew

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medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

**Thank you so much Scholastic Press and Kelly Andrew for the arc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 27 April 2024

3.7 (rounded up to4) out of 5 stars.

Phew, okay this took me much too long to get to and even longer still to finish. I feel like if this book had been with me more consistently, I may have been less critical of it? And I say this lightly because it still got 4 stars based off my rating scale, but I have a lot of thoughts floating around about it.

To start, this isn’t my first Kelly Andrew book. I got a copy of ‘The Whispering Dark’ when it first released (I received it through Illumicrate and my sister through OwlCrate so we buddy read it). It was never finished though, and this was before I knew about DNF’ing, book slumps, reading slumps- all that jazz. So when I saw this title and read the bio, I was a little worried about trying another Kelly Andrew book since I hadn’t finished the first one. I’m really glad I read this though, because while I have my qualms about it, it was a really lovely read!

On a more critical note, the characters sometimes had annoying habits. There were also times where they fell a little flat to me or just lacked a little something that would’ve made their role in the story hit *more*.
Another thing was that I think I got lost a bit in the plot? Some things happened that kind of felt awkwardly placed or solutions just given for the sake of finding an out??
Again, it took me longer to read this book than usual, so I feel like I’ll have different opinions on this when I go back to read it and actually finish it in my usual reading time (a week, give or take. Not a whole month..)

What I *loved* about this book was the writing in some places. It was pretty, it was meaningful, it added a little depth to the flatness I found. I saved a lot of quotes from this because there was just *something* about the rotting, about the decay, and how Andrew describes it. The writing style wasn’t one of my favorites, but the things being written were- does that make sense?

Overall, it was a nice read! I did enjoy it, and I did decide to keep my OwlCrate copy of it. I think the magic used was also interesting to me, but at the heart of it, the struggles and the growth of the main cast had me. 

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Eye of the Ouroboros by Megan Bontrager

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adventurous dark mysterious sad tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated

4.0

**Thank you so much Quill & Crow Publishing House and Megan Bontrager for the arc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 23 March 2024

3.6 (rounded up to 4) out of 5 stars.

Wow. The little girl in me who grew up reading those reddit search and rescue stories was *beyond* excited to read this! I mean, if I had the time to just sit with it, I really think I could’ve finished this in one sitting. I really wanted to and I think when my physical copy comes in, I may dedicate time to do just do that! There was just *something* about the way this read that made me devour it (as it devoured me- it was so hard to get this book out of my mind!)

The writing was pretty enjoyable. There were some bits where the details kind of went over my head, but I tend to read in inconvenient places and times (usually during my downtime at work or late at night before bed) so that could very well be the reason.
I also definitely noticed the complaint a few other readers noted on how the pacing was off, and I can agree. There were a few times where I had to read back a few pages to make sure that I hadn’t just glossed over something on accident. This leads into one of *my* desires for the book- I wish it had been longer! I loved the characters for the short time we have them, but I wish we would’ve had them for *longer*. Since the book is in Theo’s POV, I kind of feel like we miss out on some development opportunities (not saying the book had none because I grew to love the cast a lot). I was left wanting though, and I feel that if the book had been longer, some of the jumps with information and plot points could’ve also been better smoothed out. In my personal opinion though, I still throughly enjoyed the storyline we are given. I loved the mystery, the eeriness, and the creepy atmosphere with the Ouroboros and those involved.

There was something else that I noticed often while I read, and it’s the fact that the *vibes* of this read carry. Do you know when horror movies/video games have scenes that build tension over normal actions by playing eerie music in the background instead of giving much dialogue to explain what’s happening? That’s what this book felt like at times. I could practically *hear* the rising violin or the slow drags of dissonant notes before it abruptly cuts off. I could feel the unsettling air that Theo is thrown into. I’m not sure if that’s just the little me who read SARs stories making up music as I read, or if the prose itself allowed for this space to be created- whatever the answer, I loved loved loved it!

I have a few scattered notes I took as I read that don’t quite fit with my aforementioned thoughts above, so I’ll dump them here rapid-fire style:
  • The action that happens in the story hits as it’s happening- if that makes sense. The setting is already building up on eeriness and dread, that feeling like you know something is gonna happen but you don’t know *when*. But you also don’t really expect what will happen until you’re suddenly thrown into the scene. 
  • This book consumed me. It became a fan-favorite *fast* for the fact that I love this genre of horror. I’m a big fan of the Kids on Bikes TTRPG game ‘Kollok 1991’ and this gave very similar vibes! And if I haven’t stated it enough, I loved SARs stories growing up. This was everything I forgot I loved wrapped into one with a door leading straight into the thick of it (get it? Doors are kinda problematic around here- I’ll see myself out now…)
  • I feel like this was horror in that it was creepy, but not too scary? It has some gore though, wonderfully done action scenes IMO that I could almost see when I sat down and focused on reading. I really would say that this is great for people who don’t like to get scared but kind of want a nice little chiller.
  • Sometimes the characters grated me by how they acted? Theo has some development, but she says stuff that kinda contradicts? An example- she mentions that a conspiracy theorist isn’t really a bad thing because it means somebody out there is ‘crazier than her’ and also means she’s ’not alone in her belief’. But another scene further in, she uses ‘conspiracist/conspiracy theorist’ as an insult/thinks of them insultingly. It’s little things like this, but I feel like it’s just showing how Theo grows along the way too. Her thoughts do kinda change later/she eventually learns to work with different people. I think it’s the fact that Theo is tough to love at first (but man does she fight her way into your heart by the end)

Phew- didn’t mean to write near an essay about this book, so I’ll leave it with one final thing:
The ending was nice! It had enough closure to make me feel content with things, but was also open enough that I’d almost love and continuation somehow? I really did just enjoy this read so much! It was lacking in some parts as I mentioned above, but overall I loved the energy it brought. I can’t wait to make the time to just- sit and let this book consume me all over again once my preorder comes in!

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A Feather So Black by Lyra Selene

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adventurous dark tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

**Thank you so much Orbit books for the arc! All words and thoughts in this review are my own honest opinion!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 12 March 2024

3 out of 5 stars.

It was hard for me to find how I wanted to rate this book at first, but after finishing up the review and sitting with it for a bit, I realized that I was just left a bit more dissatisfied with the read than I was left interested in it. This isn’t to say that I probably won’t continue the series- because I think I may, truthfully. It definitely just didn’t become one of my favorite reads of the month.
I requested this book on NetGalley because of the cover and the touches of the swan lake story that it promised. I wasn’t terribly disappointed, but neither was I too enraptured. There were times were I was sucked in by the prose or the scene, and other times where I was just annoyed and found myself skimming paragraphs to get through bits faster. This isn’t to say that the whole book overall was *terrible*, but it definitely wasn’t my cup of tea? At the same time, I can 100% see how somebody *else* can thoroughly enjoy it through and through- and kudos to them for enjoying it!
Anyways, let’s get to the pit of it all- there will be some minor spoilers as I have to touch upon some things to discuss where my thoughts are coming from, so be warned if you’ve yet to finish the book in its entirety! I’ll try to keep from anything major though!

When I say that I loved the prose, I mean I *loved* it- when it was *good*. I found our main character that we follow (Fia in the first person pov) to be a bit annoying at times. Some other reviews pointed out the constant comparing of herself to something from the forest and yeah- it happens a lot. Sometimes it’s a lovely addition to the scene and other times it starts feeling repetitive. More often than not, it feels repetitive, but again, it flows enough into the story that it at least isn’t a forced addition thrown in to add some flourish to the book.
What I didn’t enjoy as much as the prose and writing (can I say that when I still had my qualms about it nonetheless?) was the romance. We’re kind of thrown Rogan early on in the book. We get snippets of his history with Fia, and then we get a lot (and I mean a LOT) of pining and this-way-that-way love from these two. Rogan wasn’t really a fan favorite of mine. He has his moments where the words he says are swoon-worthy, but I feel like his character is a little flat? With the readers seeing the world as Fia does, and with her already knowing Rogan, it’s hard to develop any kind of feeling for him as a character when we’re constantly thrown around with what Fia feels for him (and it’s a lot of this-no-that-no-this-again feeling which I found uninteresting after the first few times of it happening).
There’s more like- y’all don’t understand, I just couldn’t vibe with this romance. I don’t wanna say too much, but I don’t think its a spoiler if I say the possessiveness is unattractive in this sense. It’s very… I dunno, I just didn’t enjoy it. Fia has given reason enough and tried enough to nip her feelings in the bud, but he- doesn’t push his attraction on her, but struggles to let her go. I guess I can’t fault him so much for *that* much and maybe it was just my book burnout that made me hate it as much as I did. 
Irian is the second love interest we’re given and we at least learn about him *alongside* Fia. A few other reviewers have said that they didn’t enjoy another rendition of the ‘shadow magic love interest’ but I guess I haven’t read enough books featuring this character type because I kind of enjoyed Irian. He fits the bill type of some of my favorite kinds of characters but again, when it comes to the romance side of things, I lost interest. It was very… sudden? I don’t see where the hate to love/attraction comes in? It was quick. They see one another once a month for some time, but nothing ever really happens that makes me believe that they can go from distrust in one another to falling in love? There were also moments after they start showing some interest in one another and then Fia kinda snaps at him or they just have some mild animosity with one another, and then next thing you know, they’re leaning into that mutual interest again?? 

The characters are also hard to talk about. There were times where I loved them, and times where I couldn’t see why they were doing what they were. Since we follow Fia a lot, we mostly see *her* growth and change. However, there were some moments that didn’t make sense to me? This whole time, we are told Fia was ‘forged to be a weapon’ or ‘made into something sharp’ etc etc. We see her take down this beast too that even Irian had trouble taking down, but she gets whisked away when she gets a minor injury? There’s another moment towards the end where she’s not giving ‘warrior honed’ energy/she’s not shown to be the tough warrior she was forced to become (like keeping cool in the face of an emotionally heightened event which okay yeah, it’s excusable given the circumstances but imo, you can’t call this changeling a warrior and constantly note her strengths/her strict past/give her growth where she’s had to push her own emotions down to do what needs to be done and then turn around and give us this scene where she freezes up in the moment but I digress).
I loved to see the change and growth in Fia, but I wish we would’ve seen it more in Rogan, Irian, even in Eala and the rest of the swans too. Chandi was given a bit of a moment here and there too, at least. I hope that in the next book, some more focus is given to other characters? I feel like I’m also being a bit too harsh on this, because it was genuinely a good book! I enjoyed the story, but because of these other nit-picky bits, I didn’t love it as much as I hoped I would…

As I mentioned before, I can *totally* see how people could love this book! I’m being a touch *too* unforgiving against it and it probably has to do with the fact that it took me almost a month to finish this. I’d put it down, pick it up, read it for a few days and then leave it for a week before I tried to pick it up again. I’m the worst mood reader to exist and when I have to start forcing myself to finish a read (because I knew I didn’t want to DNF it yet also knew that the pub date was coming up and I wanted to post my review before if possible), I become more critical against it. I don’t fault the book so much for that, but I still think that three stars is a fair rating as I can’t seem to find highlighted marks that surpass the notes I made against it.

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Throne of Air and Darkness by Emberly Ash

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  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated

3.0

**Thank you Emberly Ash and Victory Editing NetGalley Co-Op for this eARC! All thoughts on this read are entirely my own!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 29 January 2024

3 out of 5 stars.

I keep dragging my feet when it comes to reading this second book and it’s definitely due to personal reasons than the book’s fault. I mean, I still have the same thoughts as my previous review from what I was able to get through- love and smut kind comes first. There’s a bit of a new revelation coming to light from the first book which may prove to be interesting? I just am more of the fantasy/storyline kind of reader so I wore myself out trying to get through the sprinkled smut that I personally started to find a bit awkwardly placed/done.

I’m leaving this at three stars since I *did* soft drop it, but I didn’t do so because I hated it. I’m just taking way too long to finish it and I’m a mood reader, so I don’t know when I’ll want to pick it up again and I don’t want to hold back on a review until then. I do see myself going back to finish it though! The story is fairly interesting and I do want to know where it’ll go!
To Kill a Shadow by Katherine Quinn

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Couldn’t vibe too much with the characters and I just wasn’t paying enough attention to the story to make sense of it. The writing also wasnt my favorite. I decided to just dnf/soft drop it for now and try picking it up again another time.
Crown of Earth and Sky by Emberly Ash

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adventurous dark tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated

3.0

**Thank you Emberly Ash and Victory Editing NetGalley Co-Op for this eARC! All thoughts on this read are entirely my own!**
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The Storygraph
Posted on: 12 January 2024

3 out of 5 stars.

So this was definitely A Read. It wasn’t bad, exactly, but I can definitely see how people either loved it or hated it- and I feel like I’m somewhere in between but leaning to liking it? I’m no stranger to DNFing ARCs, and clearly I didn’t do that, so I think part of me enjoyed this more than I thought??
Anyways, I digress. Let me actually review-

Crown of Earth and Sky is definitely a… love and smut first kind of book. The storyline kind of came second to the lust Arran and Veyka have for one another. It did get awkward in some places though, a little less than seamlessly sprinkled throughout the book in what feels like a way to appeal to romance readers. The descriptions also took away from the flow of the writing (Veyka’s breasts or her body are definitely mentioned a lot and it gets kind of overdone in some places) which already wasn’t too much my cup of tea, but it wasn’t terrible! There’s a few golden highlights that I have, a few choice quotes that snuck into my brain.
The storyline felt a little… odd though? The pacing is a little slow. The book focuses more on the relationship aspects. There wasn’t much going on during some points that I almost forgot what the overarching goal was (besides revenge- we never forget that, it’s also mentioned a lot). The plot just didn’t make too much sense to me at first, I think, because Veyka and Arran’s feelings for one another shadowed the plot points/interrupted moments too often for me to remember what just happened.

I think what saved this book for me was just all the strong women. I love a good angry character and Veyka wasn’t one of my favorites, but she has room to grow which is something that does slowly start to happen. There’s a little bit of sisterhood, a little bit of healing, and a lot of powerful women who can command a room with ease (Gwen is definitely one of my favorites). I’m just not a big fan of Veyka and Arran’s relationship until roughly the last 30-ish percent. It was borderline toxic how they just lusted over each other and hated each other when they weren’t having sex. It gets a bit better though, which is probably the other reason I stuck with it.
I will say though, Emberly Ash posts character portraits on her Instagram and I still can’t decide if these are AI or not? I’m still learning how to tell, but at least eye wise, they don’t look off or wonky how I’ve seen other AI creations look, which is the only reason I want to say they aren’t AI, but I’d love to know for sure if anybody else knows! I think it’s definitely an issue to bring up because we all should know by now how damaging AI art is to real artists- but this review isn’t meant to discuss that so I digress for now.

Overall, there’s nit picky bits that I really wish could’ve been done better. The characters are slowly growing a bit more, so I have a feeling this second book will have some redeeming qualities to it! I think it’s also a genre thing. I don’t read dark romance, just *barely* started reading spicy romance, so it’s all new territory I’m getting used to.
Maybe I’ll have some new thoughts come book two?

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To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods by Molly X. Chang

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dark tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

Thank you so much Random House Publishing- Ballantine, Molly X Chang, and NetGalley for the eARC! All thoughts and reviews are my own!
Posted to: NetGalley, Goodreads, and The StoryGraph
Posted on: 8 December 2023

3.6 (rounded up to 4) out of 5 stars.

I’m trying to beat the colonizer romance allegations away with a stick, but I’m not educated enough to even begin defending why I think it’s not one, so bear with me, readers, because this is gonna be A Ride as I get my thoughts together.

Okay so, I like the premise of this. I throughly enjoyed the idea that Chang has here. I just feel like it was lacking in the sense that… okay yeah, it’s a YA book but I almost wish it wasn’t so more topics would be hit further in depth than the rating would (I assume) allow. I’ll probably end up flagging this as a spoiler-review because there’s no way I can avoid mentioning a few key details throughout it.
But TL;DR: Ruying isn’t a full apologist. There’s a lot of potential to be had with the story and the characters, but it also feels like it’s lacking in some places. (I go more in depth below!).

When people say that death happens off-page more than on- yeah. It does. Well, there’s some of Ruying’s abilities being displayed at first (to show how her magic works), but once we as the readers have an established sense of the ‘how’, it does a bit of a time-skip. We get Death’s brief point of view (which I kind of almost want to see more of but I digress) and then it continues on with the story where we see a few more deaths done by Ruying. I think that readers are meant to feel the weight of these deaths by the constant mention of Ruying doing it for the Roman side rather than fighting for and with her own people. We are shown her guilt for her work, the constant back and forth between ‘is this right?’ and ‘is this wrong?’
It’s kind of hard to feel for Ruying (and many characters in that matter), in my opinion, because I couldn’t connect to her. I feel that we could have learned more about her personality and her motives besides being family-driven. Chang writes in instances that make Ruying care for her sister and her grandmother, but I think I wanted to feel more? This isn’t to say that Ruying is a bad character, but rather, I just would’ve liked to see more of her. There was almost a bit more tell not show. I understand that YA novels do have length limits and that this is also a series (so more may be uncovered later), but if it was longer, I think it could have been fleshed out more to include some more scenes of her past that explain who she is now with the knowledge she has now. We’re told that she can sneak around easily and knows how to fight some because her grandmother was the actual brains behind her grandfather’s title so she showed her grandchildren these skills to help them. I would’ve loved to be shown some of this though, or add some flourish or something to it? Just- it felt like something was missing throughout. The characters (not just Ruying!!) felt a little flat to me. I hated the villains for the sake of what we are told they did, but I wish there was more to their character like- show me how vile Valentin is. Show me why the Ghosts and the Phantom are on thin ice. Show me why Baihu is doing what he is. Show me more of this revolution and the tension. That’s one of the issues with first person because it limits the readers to what this character sees and feels, and I think that (for me at least) I would’ve loved to see more of the surroundings and the people interacting with Ruying, and how they come into play more than just the surface level understanding we get. Her family (the whole reason she’s roped herself into this mess) also eventually fades off into the background some and I would’ve loved to see more of them (or some split POV with Meiya because I feel like she’s going to be a larger piece on the board soon).

And now, on to the romance side of things. The reason I say this isn’t inherently a colonizer romance is because Ruying doesn’t excuse what Antony does. She <i>knows</i> that he is bad and is doing so much bad, but she can’t help how she feels when he treats her nicely. She’s captivated by this different, poor boy side of him that relates so much to her. She feels that he’s different than his family. She never fully excuses his actions and even tries to nip these feelings in the bud because she understands that he still had a hand in killing her people and making a wreck of her home and her world. I feel like that’s what separates this from an actual colonizer romance because Ruying doesn’t make excuses nor apologizes (she does claim that Antony is helping both sides though, but this is also a thought that she half-believes when put up against the people she’s told to kill for him). I think it really depends on how one defines a ‘colonizer romance’. I don’t really vibe with the romance plot in here either though, because she is still falling for the enemy and not in the sense that the enemy is just a morally grey villain- he’s literally the adopted son of the Roman leaders who are wanting to take Jing-City for their own survival (all explained in more detail literally the last few chapters of the book). I didn’t really like the way their romance tried to play out, but I can also see why it was playing out because Ruying is singled out, alone in this cold side of the world where she doesn’t fit in and suddenly somebody is unafraid of her magic and her past and finds her beautiful. I just didn’t vibe with the idea of who this somebody was, ya know?

I really thought this book would be almost like Song of Silver, Flame Like Night (and spoilers here for that book real quick) but if after Lan was captured by the Elantians, she didn’t escape and was forced to help them find the demons instead. It had similar premises with the colonizers raiding lands not their own, all for more and more power. I even liked the magic system Chang has established in To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods. It’s explained more how it works also at the end of the book, but it’s a solid system that really makes me want to see more.
Do I think I’ll stick around for the rest of the series? I think so. The way this one ended did make me want to see more of it, but it definitely hasn’t been my favorite read. It’s right up my alley in themes that I like, all the way down to this young, hungry, and desperate girl willing to do anything for her family to survive. There’s just some places that it lacks in and places that it could be better played out in.


If you stuck around to the end of this review, I commend you! I literally did not know how to get my thoughts together to lead this nor how to end this beyond saying that it’s a pretty good read! It does read like a YA though (which I don’t know why I was expecting a more adult book when I knew it was YA????). I feel like I’ve also rated it higher than it’s initial 3 star I was planning because it has a lot of potential! It has redemption in the next book, and it just has the type of character I want to see all the way through to the end. Ruying is desperate for the chance to keep her family safe. She’s entirely naive to the way the world is and relying on just what she knows and what she wants to believe to be true. She has a lot of room for some growth and change, and I think I really do want to see that happen enough to continue with the series. 
There’s a chance I’ll come back and edit this review after sitting on my thoughts more, but as of now, I’ll leave it at it's initally earned 3.6 (4) stars.

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