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avokaitotoast's reviews
23 reviews
If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio
Long Review:
dark
mysterious
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
If We Were Villains - M. L. Rio
☆ ☆ ☆
Short Review (TL;DR):
⤑ Need to not hate Shakespeare
⤑ Very similar to The Secret History, but not so much that it’s boring
⤑ Kind of predictable
Long Review:
I was a little nervous coming into this simply because it’s always recommended in those “If you loved The Secret History”, you’ll love this!” threads, and that has done me dirty many times.
In many ways this book is similar to TSH: the greek introduction of the tell all prologue, the flawed characters, the academic and eerie setting. Perhaps it seems like a rip off, but all of those are found in both greek tragedies and Shakespeare.
I don’t think you need an understanding of Shakespeare to enjoy this, but you can’t be put off gratuitous use of his works; and if you do know some Shakespeare that almost does you a disservice. I felt pretty confident in my theory about the end very early on simply because of how purposeful the use of Shakespeare was; who was assigned what part, who quotes who frequently, the characters names in general.
Because I figured out the twist so early I did experience some reading burnout half way through - it does drag a bit, but I can’t tell if that’s simply because I was no longer in suspense or if it was just written strangely.
All that being said - this is a nice book. It holds up against other dark academia thrillers, and I loved being immersed into Shakespeare’s works (it made me want to pick up some of my old copies). Is it phenomenal? No. But it’s a good read!
Paul Takes the Form of a Mortal Girl by Andrea Lawlor
informative
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Paul Takes The Form of a Mortal Girl - Andrea Lawlor
☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
NSFW Content Warning: this book has (a lot of) graphic smut in it. You might already know that, but I always like to make that very clear at the start of my reviews in case that’s not your cup of tea. More details in my Content Warning if you’d like!
How to describe this book to someone asks “What are you reading?”:
A book of snapshots about gender and sexuality in the 90s.
Short Review (TL;DR):
- a wonderful portrayal of how it can feel to be queer; and to feel an otherness even within the community
- hidden gems of literary inspiration
- if you cannot read smut at all this is not for you. if you’re on the fence about it just get through the first chapter. it’s worth it.
Long Review:
“We’re just what we are.”
This book is a gut wrenching showcase of the queer experience. It’s more of a catalogue of Paul’s adventures with sexuality and gender than a plot-based narrative. If you come in looking for a love story or a grande queer redemption in the face of 90s homophobia you will be disappointed.
There are so many thoughts that Paul experiences that I think queer readers will read and think “exactly!”; when he fantasises about being with a woman, he’s also a woman; the imposter syndrome he faces both as Paul and as Polly; his constant confusion about “what he is” and “why is he like this”.
The jump between raunchy encounters and incredibly intellectual discussions about queer culture should have been disjointed, yet Lawlor somehow manages to make the stark contrast work. In a way, it provides depth to Paul’s character: yes, he’s flamboyant and almost stereotypical in the way he appreciates fashion and flirts and loves, but he is filled with a deep confusion, rage, and fear that is constantly being affirmed by the anti-queer climate.
The “interludes” (as I’m choosing to call them; iykyk) were unexpected and brought a more literary approach to the story. They can seem so random and unimportant, but they really give you something to chew on which I found really nice. The fairy (the pun must be intended) tale nature of them lends itself to Paul’s constant dialogue of the inherent otherworldly-ness he feels.
You can tell that queer history and experiences are something incredibly important and deeply studied by Lawlor. The more scholarly exploration can be a bit like reading an essay (which may not be everyone’s favourite), but they add a great deal of intelligence and understanding to Paul.
All in all this is an expressive narrative about the magical but brutal queer experience. It’s truly excellent.
“He could stay here forever, and time would stop, and he wouldn’t have to choose anything.”
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
How NSFW is this?
I was hesitant to pick this up because of the NSFW nature. I don’t mind reading it, but I do feel like authors often hide their lack of technique, theme, or message behind erotica. However, interwoven between Paul’s (frequent) sexcapades are snapshots of what living as a queer person in the 90s was like: fear, rage, confusion, secrecy.
The first chapter is incredibly explicit and then it tapers off. Most of the time I find that smut is unnecessary, however, it makes perfect sense in the narrative. It’s not uncommon for people to use promiscuity to mask or protect themselves from both themselves and the world around them. I feel like Lawlor did an excellent job expressing that through Paul.
Further notes for those who want more information about the level of explicitly:
* content is graphic, but often short
* paul does think about sex often and sometimes in problematic ways
* chapter 1 is incredibly explicit and Paul is definitely using sex as a coping mechanism and a way to connect with people. this does change!
* Paul does revert to his more promiscuous adventures later - it again, aligns with the narrative. It is less graphic and less monopolising than the first chapter.
These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever
Did not finish book. Stopped at 82%.
Did not finish book. Stopped at 82%.
These Violent Delights — Micah Nemerever
(DNF - 82% complete)
I thought this was just fine. I found out about it from one of those “What to read if you loved ‘The Secret History’” posts — and if you loved TSH for the plot and thriller-ish aspects then that makes sense; if you loved TSH for the prose/literary/philosophical aspects then this book is not like TSH at all.
I don’t have much to say about this book to be honest, because (as I said) it was simply fine. Nothing to really hate about it but nothing to love.
I enjoyed the characters for the most part and had a fun time trying to determine who was truly the instigator. The middle dragged on a bit, but not so much that I couldn’t keep reading.
The Leopold and Loeb references were interesting. To me, Paul is incredibly Autistic-coded and it worked really well. The whole premise is supposedly about queer isolation, and Paul feels even further isolated because of how “weird” he is, how he doesn’t react to things “correctly”, or know what to say, or how to read social interactions
About DNF-ing: I rarely DNF a book, especially if I’ve read so much of it. I feel like that shows how I was feeling about it. I truly felt like I was pushing myself to read it. I’ve finished plenty of “bad” books before, and as I’ve said before I wouldn’t call this a bad book - I just truly couldn’t get invested, even being so close to the end.
The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt
challenging
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
The Goldfinch - Donna Tartt
☆ ☆ ☆ (3/5)
How to describe this book to someone asks “What are you reading?”:
700 pages of visual-escapism so beautifully written that you don’t realise until you’re at the end how incredibly boring the last 600 pages were.
Short Review (TL;DR):
- standard tartt : gorgeous prose, flawed-to the point of “is this problematic” characters, technically amazing writing
- thematically a let down
- grief and guilt themes could have been so much more gut wrenching
- i have mixed thoughts on if this is a “good” book, but i DO think it’s worth a read
Before You Read:
Things to think about as you read this book.
- how does your perception change with age and trauma
- grief and guilt (specially survivors guilt)
Long Review:
This was a complicated review to complete. Normally by the middle of a book I can tell what my star rating is, what my general thoughts are about the writing - both on a technical and thematic standpoint - and what the author was trying to say with their work. However, by page 500 of The Goldfinch I couldn’t figure it out.
I couldn’t put the book down, I anticipated reading more, I got lost in her world — and yet I had a constant feeling of unease and confusion: I couldn’t put it down, so why do I not like it? Seems oxymoronic.
A Vox interview from when the film released describes my feelings perfectly. To summarise: this book is beautiful, you can get lost in the prose, you feel like you’re reading something special - until you try and pin point what that “special” is. You feel duped in a way.
The time between the releases of her previous novels and The Goldfinch brings a lot of questions to me. When I decided to pick up TG and realised how long it had been between her releases I had mixed feelings. Is this a cash grab or did Tartt feel like she finally had something worthwhile to say?
Tartt is objectively an incredible writer: her prose and her technique are lovely. But in the case of The Goldfinch it seems as though she hides her (let’s be honest) boring and overdone themes behind her technique.
It also felt like she was trying to appeal to a 2013 audience — manic pixie dream girls, euphoria-esque (well before euphoria) dramatic drug use, trauma galore — and it just didn’t feel natural. The intellect of the book seemed so much lower compared to The Secret History, which was a huge part of why I was drawn in by Tartt.
I hate to compare two books to each other (especially for review purposes), but after loving TSH so much, I can’t help it. While reading TSH I was constantly discovering subtle connections to philosophical works I had read in school (Hegel shout out), or retold themes from epic poems. I had tabs and tabs and tabs open of research to put together the connections I was making as I read. I found it less accessible, but a read that made me feel both accomplished and satisfied.
As I read the The Goldfinch I felt nothing. I was escaping - like Theo - into a world of beautiful words and leaving feeling empty. And if that was the intent, then this is the smartest book I’ve ever read. However, I don’t think that’s the case.
My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh
reflective
relaxing
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
☆ ☆ ☆ (3.5/5)
Short Review (TL;DR):
Short Review (TL;DR):
- Felt very guilty pleasure — not a lot of substance, but enjoyable
- Hated everyone, but also loved to hate them
- Sprinkle of female friendships and mother-daughter relationship analysis
Long Review:
Based on the cover I had expected something a little bit more intellectual or something with a bit more grit: this book was not that. It was, however, a very enjoyable read.
Based on the cover I had expected something a little bit more intellectual or something with a bit more grit: this book was not that. It was, however, a very enjoyable read.
It has that “guilty pleasure” quality that reminded me of reading The Clique or Gossip Girl in middle school, but for adults: rich people having problems and really not doing anything but developing a pill popping problem about it.
I love an intentionally dislikable main character and this gave me exactly that. Like this girl is so privileged and out of touch with reality. But also, she’s living everyone’s “dream “ right? I don’t know how many times I’ve said something along the lines of “I wish I could sleep for a month” or “I wish I could pause life for a year and just do nothing”.
Also I just enjoy any book that explore female friendships and/or mother-daughter relationships and this gave me a little if that which was nice!
On the ending: The second Reva got the job at the world trade center I knew what would happen and I’m so mad about it. Reva deserved so much more.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Drug abuse and Drug use
Moderate: Body shaming, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, and Death of parent