Scan barcode
A review by bookish_kristina
One and Only by Karla Sorensen
2.0
The tropes were not troping for me in this one.
2.5 stars because I liked the writing, I liked the emotion and I liked the Wilder family dynamics in this book but the entire premise sucked balls, here’s why:
1. He lies to the mother of his child and co-parent (who he apparently respects and has a good relationship with) so she will follow through and leave the country for a year leaving his daughter with him. This is a shitty way to co-parent. How about just having a deep conversation to address her fears and anxieties about leaving you with a daughter you haven’t been a full time parent to, like, ever.
2. The idea that he CAN’T be a good full time parent as a man and NEEDS to have a fake wife situation for his ex to be comfortable leaving him with his daughter speaks volumes on two things:
a. that men can’t parent kids effectively without women. Bullshit. Men are fully capable of being effective and nurturing single dads.
b. He has had six years to prove to his ex that he’s a good dad and trust worthy, the fact that he hasn’t and she’s so ok with leaving her kid only AFTER she finds out he’s getting married (to a stranger she does not know) is so fucking shitty I can’t even begin to tell you how infuriated I was by it. But since he actually is lying to her I wouldn’t trust him for two seconds either.
3. He thinks bringing a stranger into his life and his home will be a good idea for his daughter who is EXTREMELY sensitive, in therapy and has trouble dealing with change. So marry a stranger who was good with her for half an hour ONE TIME and then *checks notes* live with her in a fake marriage for a year before divorcing and ripping apart the new family the child has become accustomed to. Fucking give this guy a trophy for worst parenting decision ever. As the mother of a sensitive, anxious child on the adhd spectrum, I object to all of this.
4. Her reason for getting fake married is because she overheard her dying father say he will miss not walking one of his daughters down the aisle is weak and terrible. First she’s tricking a dying man and her entire family to create a photo op essentially. Second, the entire idea of a dad walking a woman down the aisle is rooted deeply in terrible patriarchal ideas of women as property so it’s fucked up in so many ways. This isn’t a good moment for anyone.
5. They plan on never filing the license with the state and breaking up a year later, explaining it to everyone as ‘not working out’ so the plan was to lie to everyone for the rest of their lives? Sew gerrreeeaat.
6. He resists being with her in a real way for 90% of the book because it would complicate things FOR HIM. He says if he gets involved with her and passes that line she will destroy him… but it’s ok for her to get close to his daughter, and her family to get close to his daughter etc etc etc but HE MUST RESIST SEX! Are we supposed to admire him for this? It honestly made no sense why he pushed her away for so long but never had any boundaries with her and his extremely sensitive (probably on the spectrum) daughter. Again, here’s another trophy for amazing parenting
2.5 stars because I liked the writing, I liked the emotion and I liked the Wilder family dynamics in this book but the entire premise sucked balls, here’s why:
1. He lies to the mother of his child and co-parent (who he apparently respects and has a good relationship with) so she will follow through and leave the country for a year leaving his daughter with him. This is a shitty way to co-parent. How about just having a deep conversation to address her fears and anxieties about leaving you with a daughter you haven’t been a full time parent to, like, ever.
2. The idea that he CAN’T be a good full time parent as a man and NEEDS to have a fake wife situation for his ex to be comfortable leaving him with his daughter speaks volumes on two things:
a. that men can’t parent kids effectively without women. Bullshit. Men are fully capable of being effective and nurturing single dads.
b. He has had six years to prove to his ex that he’s a good dad and trust worthy, the fact that he hasn’t and she’s so ok with leaving her kid only AFTER she finds out he’s getting married (to a stranger she does not know) is so fucking shitty I can’t even begin to tell you how infuriated I was by it. But since he actually is lying to her I wouldn’t trust him for two seconds either.
3. He thinks bringing a stranger into his life and his home will be a good idea for his daughter who is EXTREMELY sensitive, in therapy and has trouble dealing with change. So marry a stranger who was good with her for half an hour ONE TIME and then *checks notes* live with her in a fake marriage for a year before divorcing and ripping apart the new family the child has become accustomed to. Fucking give this guy a trophy for worst parenting decision ever. As the mother of a sensitive, anxious child on the adhd spectrum, I object to all of this.
4. Her reason for getting fake married is because she overheard her dying father say he will miss not walking one of his daughters down the aisle is weak and terrible. First she’s tricking a dying man and her entire family to create a photo op essentially. Second, the entire idea of a dad walking a woman down the aisle is rooted deeply in terrible patriarchal ideas of women as property so it’s fucked up in so many ways. This isn’t a good moment for anyone.
5. They plan on never filing the license with the state and breaking up a year later, explaining it to everyone as ‘not working out’ so the plan was to lie to everyone for the rest of their lives? Sew gerrreeeaat.
6. He resists being with her in a real way for 90% of the book because it would complicate things FOR HIM. He says if he gets involved with her and passes that line she will destroy him… but it’s ok for her to get close to his daughter, and her family to get close to his daughter etc etc etc but HE MUST RESIST SEX! Are we supposed to admire him for this? It honestly made no sense why he pushed her away for so long but never had any boundaries with her and his extremely sensitive (probably on the spectrum) daughter. Again, here’s another trophy for amazing parenting