This month I knew I wanted to dive into a Morrison novel due to the praise her prose receives. I decided to start with her debut novel. I didn't know what to expect going into this book. I did however have the pleasure of listening to her narrate her own novel via audiobook.

This book is definitely tough at times. Both for the content and the format. And while the former is kind of quintessential to the story, the latter is a criticism even Morrison recognizes in her own author's note, reflecting decades later. 

The story follows many characters over different times, but their stories are all personally involved with a young black girl, Pecola Breedlove - who prays every night for blue eyes. The story is never actually told through her point of view, only others. I realized what a powerful view this was for Morrison's narrative, as most of the topics we explore are those that are thrust upon someone. Mainly self-loathing through a viciously racist society, trying to find your place in the world as your family falls apart around you, and a girls' desire for beauty in a society that still values women for this quality most. 

"I focused therefore, on how something as grotesque as the demonization of an entire race could take root inside the most delicate member of society: a child; the most vulnerable member: a female."

Some of the hardest scenes in this book have to do with the terrible things Pecola has to endure as well as the backstory of the family that were also living a fractured life. And as Morrison describes in her author's note- she chose not to shy away from the details on these people and their thoughts. 

"In exploring the social and domestic aggression that could cause a child to literally fall apart, I mounted a series of rejections, some routine, some exceptional, some monstrous, all the while trying hard to avoid complicity in the demonization process Pecola was subjected to. That is, I did not want to dehumanize the characters who trashed Pecola and contributed to her collapse."

While some of this content was hard to read - I suggest exploring the trigger warnings for this book if you are concerned - I did realize their significance to Pecola's story and the commentary it had on society of the time as a whole. Many of these characters embodied different ways that self-loathing manifested in themselves from the world around them. Claudia is our strong young girl who does not buy into the blonde-haired blue-eyed standard and as a result harbors an anger and hatred for this ideal and the white children who embody it. Cholly, Pecola's father, is damaged greatly by his hatred and humiliations and finds control through exercising his often dangerous freedoms and rage, especially over women with whom he can feel in control. Pauline, Pecola's mother, feels such a way about herself that she does not see it as an option to abandon marriage nor form a connection to her own children, finding only value in how well she can contribute to the white household she works for. And of course Pecola herself, who sees how treasured and loved the white girls are, from the baby dolls to the movies to her own mother. Surely if she looked more like them with her pretty blue eyes, bad things would not happen to her. Her own ugliness is her fault and the reasons why things are like they are for her.

All in all, I am thankful I journeyed into Morrison's writing with this book. Her prose is excellent and beautiful, and balances in-the-moment storytelling with almost poetic description. However the structure of the novel, with the timelines and different points of views did throw me off a few times and didn't feel right. Then, with some of the darker themes- I am fine with being uncomfortable when reading. I welcome it especially for important topics as these and know it is often necessary. I was personally a bit more sensitive to some of the darker scenes in this book, which is why I suggest exploring the trigger warnings. Some people may be put off from the book completely for these things. While they did not personally make me put the book down, I recognize this is a possibility for many.

I can see why Morrison is such a praised and loved novelist, and I look forward to reading more from her in the future!