8 reasons why books need to stay books and Buzzfeed listicles need to stay Buzzfeed listicles and they shouldn't go and try to copy each other's concepts (reasons that also simultaneously sort of tell what the book is about)
1. okay, so your father is gay, and you need a whole book to get over that fact, good for you, wow, I have so many other things to do in this open & tolerant 21st century society then panic and rant about my gay dad
2. okay, so you're in love with a manic pixie dream girl because you're a teenager and 20 pages into the book, it's pretttty clear where that story line will be going
3. except I need to read 600+ pages of listicles first
4. at least half of which the book could have done without
5. seriously, dude, enough with the listicles already
6. no one cares in what order you eat the cookies you bought, just so you could make a listicle named Cookies In The Order In Which I Ate Them and then attach to each cookie a completely unrelated rambling about one of your Gigantic Teenage Problems that you might as well NOT HAVE WRITTEN AS A LISTICLE but as a normal chapter in a normal book
7. okay, so you play bass in a very mediocre rock band that's never going to go anywhere
8. okay and then suddenly the book is done.

3 ways I need to say goodbye to this book right now
1. okay book
2. bye now
3. see you NEVER