When I started this book, I thought it was a strong 3 star. I have never been so pleased to be wrong. 

At the start, I hated Kyr. Borderline stopped reading because I found her to be so awful. I hated the gender essentialism, internalized and otherwise. I hated the bleak world. But it fascinated me, even so, and I read on. 

Every character I thought I hated had such character growth. By the end, I honestly loved every single major character. These were some of the best character arcs I have ever seen, full stop.

The single thing I’m going to say I really did not care for was the characterization of Avi as a redhead. He is unlikable, gay, promiscuous, unattractive. These are some stereotypes that get applied to redheads regularly (though some not as often to men). Didn’t love the stereotype, but I do love Avi. So.

I am such a sucker for aliens and sentient ai/whatever was going on with the Wisdom. LOVED the character growth it? They? Got at the end. “I am a pleasure yacht.” !!!

And Yiso. I want to kiss them on their little crest!!! Every time they were hurt, I was physically upset. I love them so much. 

This whole spoiler section is just me gushing, but the two of them deserve it.

It’s such a cliche to say I couldn’t put this down, but for the later 80% of the book, I was losing sleep, carving out breaks in my work day just to keep reading. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I was sobbing by the end. 

In one book, Emily Tesh has become an auto-read author for me. If you enjoy explorations of nationalism, fascism, cult tactics, found family, identity, and purpose, you have to give this book a shot. It won’t be for everyone (please check those trigger warnings), but this got into my brain and has lodged itself there. Excellent read.